Ambien

In an interview around 1997 with Bo Peabody (author: Lucky or Smart - google it) a reporter asked Bo what kept him up at night. Bo replied that what kept him up at night was the fact that he was not up at night. The point is that at that stage of his life and career as an entrepreneur the fact that he had to sleep and could not work all the time bothered him. Ahhhh, speak to me brother. This life, my life is not all roses. I have been struggling with sleep for a long time. I have excepted insomnia as part of the territory but truly, it sucks. Call it worry, stress, an all consuming passion, a combination of the three...whatever you wish but it affects me. At the age of 37 I realize that I have been doing this for so long that it is probably taking a few years (or more) off the end of my life. I try to counteract the lack of sleep (and the stress that causes it) with exercise, good eating, prayer, meaningful conversations with my wife and friends, etc. But it is tough. Tough to let go.

So, I await the telltale effects of the Ambien CR I just took. I can't take another 2AM night. I have to break the cycle. I actually hate resorting to sleep drugs. It bothers me because the act of taking them is an active confirmation that I am not in control. Whew...that last sentence is definately another blog entry.

I could go on about "be careful what you wish for" or how ALL of life is a tradeoff and how if you pursue one passion hard enough then another will suffer, but I won't...because my cheeks are starting to tingle and I am going to snore like a dang wildebeest tonight. Good night.